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I’m the kind of person that always needs to be doing something. I thrive on the feeling of being productive and getting things done. And I know that I am not alone. A lot of people, most people, feel the same on some level. We live in a world where staying busy is seen as good, and downtime is seen as bad. I want to talk for a minute about the benefits of slowing down, enjoying a lazy weekend, and rejuvenating from an exhausting week along with what I have been doing recently to achieve a restful weekend and life.
To begin, I need to give you some insight into my current life situation. I am married, working a full-time job, learning how to live independently of my parents while also learning to be the wife God has called me to be. My husband is a grad student, meaning he does not have a job and I am the sole money-maker of our marriage while he focuses on school. I have burnt myself out trying and working too hard to provide for us, to save for what we want (a house), and in just trying to keep up with the world around me and the never ending demand for more. More time, more money, more energy. I graduated in May of 2020 with a bachelor’s degree in graphic design, and to this day, I still don’t have a job in my field of study. But I have a job. I have the opportunity to provide for my husband and I, and to save for our future while he prepares for his career as a therapist. And that is something that I am beyond thankful for, especially after the past year of trials and tribulations we have been through with my injury.
However, with my job comes a lot of tiredness and frustration. I work an average of 45-50 hours a week as a personnel director. It is quite often a stressful environment, and by the time I get home, I am exhausted and barely want to do anything or engage with anyone. I have seen over the past few months how this has affected not only me, but my husband as well and our relationship with each other. I get upset easily, I leave him to do a lot of the chores around the apartment, and sometimes I’m just plain mean. And not to blame this all on my job, but the burnout culture of my job definitely has something to contribute to the matter of my short temper.
I have come to see my weekends as a sanctuary to my mental and physical health. I have begun to reorient my mind frame around the weekend to be an opportunity for growth and rest rather than for sleep and laziness. And let me be clear, there is a difference between rest and laziness, a big difference. Rest is an intentional choice to set aside the things that cause worry, anxiety, and stress to instead partake in activities and people that bring you joy and help to re-energize you.
This weekend in particular, I did not set an alarm, which for me was a hard thing to do. I always think that sleeping in will cause me to miss a lot of my day and make it seem wasteful. But as it turns out, I tend to wake up around six in the morning whether I set an alarm or not, and even if I do go back to bed, I am always up by seven. Just the practice of not setting an alarm was such a good thing for me mentally. The feeling that there is no expectation to get up at a certain time, and the lack of shame I feel when I fail to do so and instead snooze the alarm half a dozen times is incredible.
I go on a run or walk everyday with my husband, which is saying a lot considering what I have been through physically this past year. I very recently began to run again (rather slowly I might add), and the simple activity of doing something that for a long time I thought I would never do again is so life-giving. And while I do not run very far, and I walk most of the time, it brings me joy and peace to know that my healing is not done yet. It gives me hope to continue to try and get better and stronger. For the past few months, I have felt stuck in where I am in the recovery process of my foot injury. And this reintroduced ability to run again has gotten me out of that mental slump of feeling inadequate or not quite whole. Allowing myself to be slow in my healing, and celebrating my successes, has been a huge contributor to giving my soul rest and reassurance in my future.
I have also carved a much more significant amount of time out of my days recently to spend time in the Word of God. This alone is a practice through which I have seen so much growth in myself. I recently acquired a study Bible called The Jesus Bible, and it has helped me so much to dig deeper into God’s Word and the meaning behind the verses. Before, I would read my Bible just to check it off of my to-do list without any thought, and now I am always anxious to sit down and read my Bible and to connect with God, to seek His knowledge. I feel at peace when I dive into the Word now, resting on God’s promises for my life and believing in Him to provide for me and my husband. It takes the pressure off of me to always perform and produce when sometimes I can’t. In Matthew 11:28, God says “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” That is exactly what he does for me. When I desperately need rest and separation from the busyness of this world, He pulls me into His embrace and His promises.
Along with reading my Bible, I have also found time again to read other books just for fun. When I was a teenager, I would read multiple books a week, sometimes even reading a book in one day or one sitting. Since starting college, this habit has faded. Being busy, and the tiredness that comes from being busy, has stripped the joy and desire of reading from my life. At the beginning of this year, I started a list of all of the books that I have read in 2021, and so far I am at sixteen and a half books (in the middle of two right now). Some are faith-based, and others are fictional novels. Giving myself the permission to slow down enough to enjoy books again has been great for me and something I hope to continue long into the future. It gets me away from my phone, from social media and from the rest of the world. And that in and of itself has helped me to reset the pace of my life and really focus on what matters to me.
The last thing that I will say about rest is that sometimes it is important to just sit still and be silent. Let God speak to you with no distractions, let Him pour life back into you and show you the joys around you. Take time to be thankful for what you have, and ask God to reveal the opportunities He is placing in front of you right now. When we slow down and allow ourselves to rest and really lean on God and His will for our lives, the busyness of this world has no hold on us. We can let go of our anxieties and our fears for the future, because He holds us in His hands. So rest, brothers and sisters, and let God take it from here.
“Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” Matthew 11:29
Love it all! Thanks!