I have always been hesitant to spend money. Sometimes I would even say that I hate it. Finances have always been the number one thing that causes me anxiety and stress, and now that I am an adult and expected to keep track of and manage my own finances, it is extremely daunting.
I was the kid that never spent her birthday or Christmas money, I saved it all. I would pride myself in how much money I had in my bank account, thinking that was the reason for it: just to stare at it and watch it accrue over time. Every time I was faced with having to take money out of my account, I felt like I couldn’t breathe and the anxiety overwhelmed me. I saw spending money as wrong, something to be ashamed and scared of. I was, and sometimes still am, the foolish servant from Matthew 25 that buried the money entrusted to them, rather than investing it in good things to multiply their wealth and blessings.
Throughout my life, God has tested me with money, seeking for me to trust Him for provision and financial security. I have always had such a tight grip on my money, that even entrusting it to my Heavenly Father seemed like too much to ask. I was hesitant to tithe, or give any money to the church at all. I would give maybe $20 here and there, when I felt like it, and that honestly wasn’t very often. I would always find excuses for not giving back to the church, or being generous with my earnings, and reflecting on those excuses, none of them measured up.
However, after getting married, my finances became our finances, and the way that I handled them had to change, because it no longer only affected me. Garrett is a lot better about spending money than I am, and he has helped me to mellow out a bit with it and realize that there are valid and good reasons to spend money. There have been some huge financial moves that we have had to make, and milestones (like buying our first house or paying off our car) that were steps in the right direction. Other steps felt more like sliding back down a hill after trying to run up it. They hurt, and I was embarrassed at how foolish I had been. But there was one instance in particular where I remember clearly the voice of God telling me enough is enough. I needed to trust Him with our finances.
A couple of months after our wedding, Garrett and I started experiencing significant car troubles. I had never spent more than a couple hundred dollars at any one time, and having to spend thousands to fix a car that we still owed money on was the hardest thing at the time that I had ever done. And it wasn’t a one and done kind of thing either. As soon as we fixed one thing on the car, something else had to go wrong, and we were out another chunk of money. This happened three or four times in the span of three months.
The situation was made even more stressful by the fact that I was, and still am, the only one working and bringing in an income while Garrett is going through grad school. At the time that all of the car troubles started, I had just gone through a horrific work-related injury, that ultimately required surgery, and I was out of work for two months, only receiving about 65% of my normal monthly income. Finances were tight, to say the least.
By the third time something went wrong with our car requiring us to spend a large sum of money to fix it, I was so fed up with everything, and angry at the current circumstances, that I just cried. I curled up on our bed, and I balled my eyes out. After about ten minutes of feeling utterly out of control and wallowing in self-pity, Garrett came to check on me. He was pretty numb by this point too, and just as frustrated as I was. He sat on the bed with me and we talked through all of our options. Do we sell the car and maybe get a profit since it needed significant fixes? Do we take on another car payment for a newer and more reliable car? Or do we stick with it and fix the car we currently have, knowing we still owe money on it?
We settled for fixing it, and thankfully that was the last time we have had to do so (knock on wood!) But I remember looking Garrett straight in the eyes in that moment and saying in a steady voice, “I’m tired of being scared to spend money. God is trying to tell us, mostly me, that we can’t hold our money with a tight fist anymore. We have to trust Him with it. We are going to start tithing the right way, right now. And no matter what, we will continue to do so.”
Garrett didn’t argue, and ever since then, we have consistently given 10% of our earnings back to the church as tithing. And not just 10%, but the first 10%. Before anything else, we give what God has so graciously provided in the first place, back to Him and His church to do with what He wills. It clearly states in the Bible that this is the expectation; giving our first fruits back to the kingdom of God. Proverbs 3:9-10 says “Honor the Lord with your wealth, with the first fruits of all your crops; then your barns will be filled to overflowing, and your vats will brim over with new wine” (emphasis mine). If we give back to the Lord what He first gave us, He will multiply it and bless us abundantly. And I have seen this tenfold since we decided to trust God with our finances.
Since we decided to trust the Lord with our money, we have paid off our car, bought a house, been able to purchase another vehicle that we also own outright, been presented with job opportunities that will help us build wealth and provide for a family one day, committed to going on a mission trip to Thailand, and live without fear of what might happen tomorrow. We are not debt free, and we have a long way to go, but God has blessed us and there have been situations where everything works out so perfectly, it could only have been His hand in it all.
For instance, as I mentioned in my last post, Where I’ve Been, the same day that we got the notice of our mutual acceptance on the house, I got an email for my worker’s compensation settlement amount. What I didn’t mention, however, was that it was $3,000 more than we expected, and that was exactly the amount needed to go on the Thailand mission trip in August 2022 with the Whitworth Swim Team. At that time, we were debating whether we would be able to afford to go to Thailand, and that unexpected extra amount was a clear sign from God that yes, we were absolutely meant to go on this trip! And God was providing the means to make it possible! God is so good, and if you trust him a little, He will bless you with a lot more.
And if you are like me, struggling to let go of the control of your finances and trust God with them, here are a few things that have helped me, steps and mindsets to take and adopt, that you can try. Take them at your own pace, but also know that we are called to honor God and His kingdom with our finances. I hope and pray that each of you reading this will take these steps and work towards the goal of trusting God with your money and allow Him to show you how to steward your wealth.
- Budget your earnings and create a better understanding of money.
We use the Every Dollar app by Dave Ramsey, and it is amazing for keeping track of earnings and also helps keep us accountable for what we spend. If you are good about tracking it, you will begin to see where you are overspending, and where you could be spending more (such as church and tithing).
Do research, take courses about money management that are based on Scripture and what God says about money, such as Financial Peace University. Learn as much as you can about the money that you spend, rather than going through life not knowing and going through the motions. Know what’s worth spending money on, and what you should say no to. Don’t be ignorant when it comes to your money.
- Understand that your money isn’t actually yours.
The money that you have and earn through work was first and foremost God’s. He is a good and generous Father, and He provides the means to each of us for making the money that we have. He creates the opportunities, and all things come from and out of His goodness.
So, the money that you are holding so tightly was never yours to keep in the first place. It has been given to you to steward, just like Adam and Eve were entrusted to steward the animals and produce of the Garden of Eden before The Fall. And when you approach your finances with this mentality, it is easier to let go of the control and give it back to God. If you haven’t already, I recommend that you try tithing 10% of your income, and do it consistently. And don’t do it out of obligation, but out of a sincere heart and a desire to honor the Lord (2 Corinthians 9:7).
- Prioritize your spiritual growth over your financial growth.
As it says in Matthew 6:24,”You cannot serve both God and money.” You have to choose one or the other, and I hope that you choose to grow in a relationship with the One that created you rather than to grow the amount of your bank account. One choice is much more fulfilling than the other, and prioritizing your spiritual growth will funnel into your financial growth as well. As soon as I decided to focus on the faith aspect of money management, it felt like a weight was lifted off my shoulders, because I know that God holds my tomorrow, and I don’t need to worry about what might happen.
- Find someone to hold you accountable.
Whether it is your spouse, a friend, a church member, or another family member, find someone that you trust to hold you accountable to the financial goals and expectations that you have set for yourself, or that God has set for all Christians. It is hard to keep up a habit when there is no one to encourage you or hold you to it. But when there is someone consistently and faithfully helping you and cheering you on, it feels good to keep going.
- Keep track of the blessings that come from trusting God with your finances.
Keep a log or journal of every blessing, big or small, that has come from turning your money over to God. This has helped me whenever I backslide into my old mentality of being scared to spend money, or when anxiety about what tomorrow will bring arises. God’s got you, and sometimes you just need to remind yourself of that.
6. Be patient with yourself.
As the saying goes, Rome was not built in a day. And neither will it be instantaneous for you to hand your finances over to God. As I have mentioned, I backslide too; I have bad days too. But whenever I find myself in the mentality of fear surrounding money, I remind myself of who’s I am. I belong to the Lord, and He is so good to me and will provide for me and my family as long as I trust Him with what little I have to offer.
I hope that these tips and steps find you excited and motivated to start toward the path of financial dependence on God. Beginning this process, as with all things, was the hardest part of all. But I am so glad that I did it. That day when I said enough is enough, God deserves my trust in all aspects of my life, including my finances, was one of the best decisions of my life. I am seeing the fountain of blessings overflow, and I don’t regret my decision at all.
So what are you waiting for? What’s holding you back from trusting God with your finances? Join me, take that first step, and then another. And come walk the path of trusting in God, where He is right beside you every step of the way, holding you up and setting the path before you. Where you go, He has already been. So don’t fear what tomorrow may bring, because God is already there, waiting to welcome you into the safety of His arms.
